“Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone.”
(Pablo Picasso)

Imagine that you have the perfect 24 hours to plan (money no object) – where and how would you choose to spend that time? Would you be waking to watch the sun rise over a tropical island or would you open your eyes to see a roaring fire in a mountain lodge? How would the rest of your day unfold?

If you haven’t already, spend a moment or two thinking about how you’d use those 24 hours.

When you have done that imagine that the one person you’d love to spend some time with has un-expectantly given you a call and said that they had an hour spare that day and would love to spend it with you – what do you do? You have already got your 24 hours planned out – do you say thanks but no thanks I already have plans or do you drop something else out of your perfect day?

After all there is only 24 hours in a day, that’s 1440 minutes – no more, no less. I came across some research a while back from the David Allen company that claimed that if you were to stop now and only work on the things that are on your radar of things to do on average you would have 300-500 hours worth of stuff to do.

So how to decide what to do now or leave until tomorrow? There are lots of different time management theories and techniques. Perhaps one of the most well known being Roger and Rebecca Merrill “time quadrants” made famous by Stephen R Covey including it in his book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
.

This week I invite you to play with their time quadrants and see how it works for you. If you haven’t already, grab a piece of paper and pen.

1. Divide the paper into 4 quarters.

2. Label the quarter that is top left, quadrant 1 – Urgent and important

3. Label the quarter that is top right, quadrant 2 – Important and not urgent.

4. Label the quarter that is bottom left, quadrant 3, – Urgent but not important

5. Label the quarter that is bottom right, quadrant 4 – not urgent and not important.

The Merrill’s theory is that truly effective time management happens when you work on things that fall into quadrant 2, important and not urgent.

Which may seem counter intuitive – after all surely it’s the urgent and important stuff that really needs to be done. And sometimes it feels like everything that you have on a “to do” list may feel that it fits into quarter 1 and not quarter 2.

There are a couple of things that I’ll say if you feel that most of your things fall into quarter 1 – firstly if you take a moment to take a breath and step back go through each task and check if it really does fit there or if you’ve just been telling yourself a scary story to motivate yourself to do something? (If so does it work to motivate you? Or does that lead to more stress?)

Are there actually any real world consequences if you don’t do that task today? If not then it really doesn’t belong in the urgent quadrant.

The second thing I’ll say is that you can use these quadrants as a tool to prioritise and choose what you want to focus upon and what action to take. You may find that when you first use this that you have more things fall in quarter 1 than you will have if you carry on using the quadrants.

To begin with, to enable you to start prioritising items in the 2nd quadrant, see how you can choose to do less from quadrants 3 and 4 (the not important ones.)

Let’s use this with an example from your own life:

6. What one thing could you do in your life (personally and/or professionally) that would make a tremendous positive difference if you did it consistently?

It’s your answer and it’ll be unique to you – maybe it’s going for a walk, perhaps it’s building a relationship with potential customers. The important thing is that if you choose to prioritise this, it would make a positive difference.

Your answer to that question is a perfect example of what fits in quadrant 2 – important and not urgent.

7. What is one thing that you do that would fit into the not important and not urgent quadrant? Perhaps it’s watching TV or checking your email every 15 minutes.

One word of caution here – look at the results that each item produces. If there is something that you have in the “not important” categories, but as a direct result your energy and well being benefits, then you may want to reconsider if it really is not important.

For example, if after a your morning session at the gym, or a 10 minute quiet time you are much more effective then the days when you don’t do that, consider how important that really is for you.

8. Just for fun this week take just 15 minutes a day (or whatever time frame feels right for you) and commit to replacing that time from an activity from quadrant 4 (or 3 if you prefer) with you answer to 6. (What one thing could you do in your life (personally and/or professionally) that would make a tremendous positive difference if you did it consistently?)

9. I invite you to play with the Merrill’s time quadrants this week and see the difference it makes for you. Remember this is not about doing the things you think you “should”, it’s about using methods to make a positive difference for your life.

Have a week full of time that you choose to spend

Love

Jen

“We wanted Nike to be the world’s best sports and fitness company. Once you say that, you have a focus. You don’t end up making wing tips or sponsoring the next Rolling Stones world tour.”
(Philip Knight, co-founder and chairman of Nike, Inc)

I received an email the other day that was all about someone who constantly asked themselves “What do I need to do to get this in balance?” Upon further investigation what that person really wanted was to feel happier and more relaxed – they just thought that balance was the way for them to achieve happiness and relaxation.

What this person was doing with the question “What do I need to do to get this in balance?” was focusing their attention on the process of balance rather on what they wanted the outcome to be – happiness and relaxation.

One of the things I found interesting about how this person had set this up for themselves is that they appeared to be presuming that they could only feel happiness and relaxation after they had (in this case) addressed balance in their life. Maybe I’m just impatient but personally I think it sounds far more pleasant to feel happy and relaxed and then, if you still want to, choose to address the priorities and balance in areas of your life.

Sometimes we can try harder and harder, focusing more upon the process and loose sight of how it relates to the end result. When we don’t get there we can presume that its down to some failing in ourselves rather than the method we used – phrases such as “if only I tried harder” or “I just haven’t got the will power” are all indications that that may have been happening. Rather than the method and process that you were using just wasn’t the one for you.

For example, lets say that Bob has been telling himself that he is lazy and undisciplined for not going to the gym. The result he wants is to get more exercise so that he can improve his health.
Shifting his focus to the result of taking more exercise to improve his health opens up a whole new range of possibilities, many of which he is much more willing to do instead of going to the gym.

Part of the dictionary definition of focus is “a centre or activity of interest.” This week I invite you to play with what you are focusing upon.

1. Pick something to play with, maybe it’s a new project that you want to get off to a strong start or maybe its something you’ve been working on for a while and want to give it some new focus.

2. What is the end result that you want?
What will it mean when you have this?
What will be the outcome?

3. Focusing upon the outcome that you want, write down some of the options that would take you there (no matter how silly they may appear) ?
What else could you do?

4. Re-read your answers and see which appeal to you to take action upon.

Have a lovely week of focus.

Love

In a month that sees GCSE, A-level and Scottish Higher results published in the UK, it’s a time of year when several will be just entering the full time job market for the first time.

For those who are perhaps experiencing job interviews for the first time here are some points to consider, to make the whole process easier.

Build a strong foundation

Give a strong first impression. While it is possible to recover from a weak start, why make it harder for yourself? If you’ve got a strong foundation then, just like with constructing a building, it’s a lot easier to deliver strong overall interview.

Things that you may want to consider to ensure a strong start.

• Presumably if you have an interview there is a strong possibility that the interviewer has already seen your CV or application form but what else do they know about you? What shows up if they do a web search?

You may want to set any social media sites you are a member of to private depending upon the content you have on there. Do you really want your potential boss seeing the pictures of what you got up to last weekend?

• Be on time. Know the location, time and person that you are meeting in advance.
• Dress appropriately. Appearance is one of the very first things that an interviewer will notice in a face-to-face interview (obviously this does not apply to a telephone interview.) Use this to set a strong impression.

What message do you want to give?

So building upon a strong start presumably you want to be offered this job. This is the time where you can demonstrate to the interviewer that you are a great fit for what they are seeking.

You can do this not only with your answers but also with your behaviour. Think about what qualities and attitude you want to communicate and how you could do that and stand out from the other candidates.

For example:

• Bring an extra copy of your CV – The interviewer is likely to have their own copy but this demonstrates forward thinking and shows you are prepared
• Take your own notepad to take notes of what you are told – This can be a great way to show how interested you are in the business and what your interviewer has to say.
• Turn up on time – can demonstrate good time keeping and reliability
• Use appropriate language – for example, some interviewers may view a misplaced joke as not taking the role “seriously.”

Be prepared

Know what you can bring to the role/company. Don’t leave it to chance that the interviewer hits upon the right questions to draw this information out of you mysteriously. Spend some time in advance so you are clear about the difference you can make. If you are clear in the answer yourself, then you are much more likely to be able to communicate that succinctly to your interviewer.

Demonstrate research on company. Don’t just rely upon what you are told in the interview, there is nothing stopping you finding out more in advance – the company website, local papers, word of mouth can all give you extra pieces of information. This not only will help you prepare but it will also give you the opportunity to decide if you want to work for such a business.

Most interviewers will ask you if you have any questions. Make it easy and have some already prepared. Some general questions that fit any role:

• Why is this position available?
• Is there any training or induction available?
• What are the growth plans for the business?
• What are the promotion prospects for the right candidate?
• What is the next stage in the interview process?

Attitude and State

Most job roles involve interaction with other people, either external customers or other members of the business. Employers often will take into consideration someone’s attitude. After all they can always teach a new skill or piece of knowledge but you will need to bring the appropriate attitude to the mix.

This is your first interview so let me address any concerns that you may have about a lack of full time experience. I have personally been involved in interviews where one candidate, on paper, had massive amounts of experience. However, during the interview process it was apparent that his attitude was not suitable – he had turned up late, proceeded to try and belittle other candidates and at one stage one of the interviewers, not shown the slightest bit of interest in finding out about the company etc. Needless to say he did not get offered the job and it in fact went to someone who may have needed us to spend a bit of time teaching some new skills and knowledge but we were (correctly) convinced that their attitude would make that easy.

Just because someone has massive amounts of experience it does not mean that they are the ideal fit for a role, or what the company is looking for. Concentrate on demonstrating what you can do and your attitude and state can make a huge influence.

• Relax; don’t be nervous – contrary to the common belief you don’t have to be nervous at job interviews. There are many ways of feeling something other than nerves in an interview from being aware of your breathing rate to keeping it in perspective. Find the ways that work for you and use them. [If you want extra support with this check out my dealing with interview nerves MP3 or interactive coaching program]
• Remember your manners – It’s remarkable how many candidates get so caught up in the moment they forget to say thank you if provided with a drink etc.
• Switch your mobile phone off, not only can it disturb the flow of your answer if it goes off at the wrong time, it is also polite.
• Follow up after the interview with a quick thank you for meeting me. Even if you don’t get this job by standing out from the rest you never know what you may get invited to apply for in the future.

Answer the question asked

This may seem an obvious statement but presumably the interviewer is asking a question because they want to know your answer. Make sure that you give them that information. If you are not sure if you have provided them with all the information, you can always ask them if they want to know more detail or if that answered their question. This gives the interviewer the option of rephrasing the question to be more specific about what they actually wanted to know.

Interviewers may not always be the most skilled at communicating what they want to know. If there is anything that you are unsure about clarify what they mean. It is so much easier to provide them with a clear answer if you understand what they asked.

Finally, remember that an interview is a two way process. It is not only the interviewers chance to check out if you fit with what they are looking for but also your chance to check if you want to be spending a lot of your time and energy in that business.

An interviewers role may be to put you at your ease but that does not mean that they (a) have the skills to do that, (b) want to or (c) they may be too nervous themselves even if they have the skills. Don’t leave it to chance, take responsibility to do everything you can to make a difference for you so you can give the strongest interview you can.

“Life is a process of working out what’s not working for you and disentangling yourself from it and trying then not to walk into the same thing again. Watching your patterns and correcting them if you can.”

(Siobhan Fayey – Musician)

I was rummaging through some old boxes the other day looking for something and discovered a box I had forgotten all about. It was a box that held bits and pieces that I had created as a child including 1 school project that even had the pattern I used.

I flicked through the detail of the pattern, with the order steps were to be taken and the overall design. I recall that even though the class were all given the same brief we had all produced different patterns to get to the end result.

It reminded me a lot of what I do now when working with someone. I look at what they are doing and in which order and we then potentially alter those patterns so that they create something new and improved.

Sometimes it may be using a model of something that has worked elsewhere – either when someone else has used that approach or it’s something that has worked in other parts of this person’s life.

Other times it is about just tweaking what they are already doing to make an adjustment to the final outcome.

This week I invite you to notice the patterns that crop up in your life.

Sometimes all it takes is for you to become consciously aware of this so that you can choose to do more (or less) of an activity or thought so that you can influence your own life.

If you don’t already set some time aside each day, this week make a written record of what you have done that day and the impact that it had on you. It can be things you’ve physically done (i.e. I felt much more energised after a 15 minute walk) or it may be a thought (i.e. I imagined what could go wrong with the work presentation next week and felt really unconfident about it all).

Spot any patterns and then you can make a choice if you want to do more or less of that pattern. Alternatively you could always start altering that pattern. For example, if you really must imagine everything that can go wrong with a work presentation use that to have contingency plans for each situation and also imagine everything going right as well

Have a week full of fun patterns

Love

I’m very excited to be offering my coaching in a new format.

“Dealing with Interview Nerves: The interactive coaching program” combines the content from my recent MP3 release and introduces some of the interactivity and accountability that previously only my one to one packages offered.

What you get:

• 11 audio tracks all designed to tackle the various causes of interview nerves and give you methods that work to use before and during an interview.
• 11 worksheets to accompany each track. Each worksheet includes a transcript of the track and space to fill in your own personal answers to questions from and about the content of the track.
• 1 months email coaching/support based upon your answers on the worksheets.

I’ve taken the common things that get in peoples way and collected practical methods, questions and techniques that will make a difference to your interview nerves.

The email coaching/support then allows us to play with the content, to tailor it specifically so you get maximum benefit. I want this to be a program that you not only use but also one that makes a positive impact upon your interviews and your life.

By the end of the program you will have:

• Identified any limiting beliefs about nerves and interviews so you can do something about them
• Challenged the 3 most common assumptions about nerves and interviews, so that they don’t get in the way of any of the other techniques
• Used spinning to feel something different instead of nerves
• Looked at possible outcomes and taken necessary steps
• Be able to use your breath to control how you feel
• Be able to use body posture for a quick burst of confidence
• Used your own knowledge about what will make a difference for you
• Reduced stress by being prepared
• Identified the message you want to communicate to your potential future employer
• Checked how you were imagining the interviewers and the situation and played with that image so that you feel different
• Rehearsed and practiced the interview in advance (and I don’t mean with role-plays)
• Identified and committed to take action that will make a difference for you

One of the reasons many books and programs that fall into the self-help category do not have a higher success rate is because people buy them and then don’t use them. The book will stay sat on the shelf gathering dust or the program will sit on the computer or in a box ignored.

I specifically designed this course to build in elements of accountability to make it easy for you to get started and use the material. So I have set the price to encourage you to use this immediately – £79 for 1 month.

After that you will still have access to all the audio and worksheets (plus the emailed coaching/support we have already done.) However if, for whatever reason you have not yet completed all the sheets, then to carry on with the email support the cost is £50 per month.

I guarantee that I will respond to every worksheet within 1 week of receiving it. In reality this will probably be a lot quicker depending upon my travelling and one to one clients schedule for that week.

By offering it in this format I hope that this will ensure that this will make a difference for you in dealing with your interview nerves.

As this does have the individual email support I want to make sure that everyone on this program gets the support offered in a timely manner. This means that there only a limited number of places available on the program at any one time.

To book your place now and get started right away click

I look forward to working with you

Love

 This weeks message is heavily influenced by the work of Michael Neill. I’m delighted to be able to announce that I will again be assisting on one of Michael’s open events next month.

“A day of transformational coaching with Michael Neill” is a one day masterclass event that is open to all. Michael is one of the most generous trainers I know and I have experienced first hand the powerful impact of his coaching. I highly recommend his work. 

This will be an amazing opportunity, not only for other coaches to see him at work, but also for the value of experiencing transformational coaching for yourself and the difference it makes to you.

Places are limited, so for more information and to book click HERE.

(If you are there on the day do come and say hello ) 

Two approaches to getting started

“All great deeds and all great thoughts have a ridiculous beginning. Great works are often born on a street corner or in a restaurant’s revolving door.”

(Albert Camus – Nobel prize winner for literature)

Have you ever had something on your “to do list” and you just can’t get started? Maybe you’ve been telling yourself that it’s a character flaw of some shape. That you are a procrastinator, or lazy. If so how’s that working for you? Is name calling actually encouraging you to get started? If it’s not, is it at least making you feel good in the process?

For reasons that escape me at the moment, I choose physics as one of the A-Levels I studied. I spent a lot of the time bemused about how the concepts were explained but a few seemed to be common sense to me. One of these was Newton’s Law of Inertia: “A body at rest remains at rest and a body in linear motion remains in motion with constant velocity until and unless an external force is applied on it.” I.e. if something is stopped, unless it has something to propel it forward (or backward), it will stay exactly where it is.

Most people find that calling themselves lazy or a procrastinator isn’t the force that propels them forward. Often when you are stuck getting going with a task, the secret is just to do one thing, and then another because once you get going, the easier it is to carry on. (It’s the law’s of physics – Sir Isaac Newton said so )

I’m sure it’s not going to surprise you, if you have read a few of these weekly messages, that I’m going to suggest that to get started one way is to find the easiest and fun way of going about that. That may be to take a huge piece of action or maybe it’s something very small that just gradually snowballs into lots of achievement.

The other week there was somebody I knew I wanted to make contact with and after a couple of hours I noticed that I was managing to do anything but make that contact. So I decided to play. Braking it down into very small tiny chunks of things to do and told myself all I had to do was that one tiny chunk. First I just drafted an email, nothing else just drafted an email (using pen and paper) because I knew I could do that. After all I didn’t have to send it.

Once I was happy with the paper draft I decided that I could at least save it as a draft on my email – again I still didn’t have to send it, just save it.

Finally, the next step was to actually hit the send button – and I knew from the number of email’s I send that I could hit the send button. 

This may have been an extreme example but it got the email sent where in the previous few hours I’d just been saying I should send that email and not doing it.

Sometimes it’s about just doing very small steps so that it seems silly not to take the next one – not ringing someone you “should”? How about just dialing 10 numbers of their phone number and then checking if it’s ok to dial the last 1. Sure you may do that a couple of times but every time I’ve seen someone do this, they quickly realise that if all they have to do is dial one more number they can do that. From that the rest of the call quickly follows.

Other times it may be about taking much bigger action then is needed. So maybe the way to tidy your desk is to tidy the entire room (or building) and the desk tidying just gets swept along.

This week I invite you to play with something that you actually want to do but for whatever reason have not yet done.

1. What would be a huge thing that you could do that would involve completing this – Perhaps it’s organising the entire building instead of just tidying 1 desk. Maybe instead of going on an occasional walk to get healthy you want to commit to training for a marathon (obviously with appropriate professional advice) 

2. Looking again at your original thing that you are playing with – how can you break that down into very, very tiny chunks?

What is the very first tiny chunk of action?

3. Re-read what you have written. Which of the 2 options appeals the most?

How can you make it more fun?

4. If you want to and it is appropriate go and do that now.

Have a week full of steps, whatever size they end up being

Love